Achievement demands that we deal with reality in a blinders-off fashion. Inquisitive about its details, we discover far more of value than we otherwise would have by demanding that reality conform to the dictates of our mind. Essentially, this is what we do when we assume. Refusing to reach beyond our own limited knowledge we forego great opportunities for learning that are likely to open up new avenues of constructive action.
Perceiving the world through the narrow lens of the ego we fail to question as much as we should. Arrogant in our ability to read our circumstances, and not wanting to appear stupid or weak by asking questions of others, we are held captive by our pride that isolates us from sources of potential benefit. In most, if not all circumstances, there will be people in our immediate environment who have information that we could use to solve problems or generate better results in our area of influence.
Willing to share what they know, all we have to do is ask. An act of humility that allows us to bridge our knowledge deficit, it is what each of us is capable of when we disassociate from the ego which teaches that we do not need the help of others who in one way or another pose a threat to us. The tale that the ego tells, it is responsible for so much of our reluctance to open ourselves to the knowledge of others. Not wanting to experience that vulnerability, we succumb to the perception that falsely assumes the predominance of ego in those who endeavour to help us.
Harbouring also the fear of rejection we choose the safest option of not asking others for something that will bring us clarity. Convincing ourselves that we will receive a ‘no’ response, we do not entertain the possibility of them meeting our request, and getting what we need to make our decisions more clearly. In my experience, people with expertise in a particular area are open to being approached for information if it is done in the right way. This means respecting their time and knowledge, and being forthright about how you intend to use it.
Even if they do shut you out, that is far from the worst thing that could happen in the circumstances. Often it will be the case that the same information will be available from another source. Your task will then be to locate it. Persistence in this task is key. Requiring the kind of focused action that is the antithesis of laziness, it is what will enable you to breakthrough with a solution, while others are stuck in the dark because of the assumptions that they have made.
The reactive nature of assumptions guarantees that they will not be as effective in producing results as proactive inquiry. Being the leader of my class who is responsible for my students learning, I didn’t meet this requirement when I assumed that they knew what the terminology meant. To better serve them I should have asked up front if they knew what the terminology meant. Then they could have proceeded with a greater understanding of the concepts. Not taking any more time than they were due, it would have saved them the anguish, and me the embarrassment of not delivering my message properly.
Learning from that experience, I will still have to exercise caution in coming to conclusions. The temptation to assume is admittedly very strong. Ever present in the moment that we are asked to make a decision under time pressure, we must remind ourselves to reciprocate and ask the right questions. An art in itself, it is the best way of getting to the heart of things.
